Everything Sucks Cuz Were All Stupid

I cannot remember the last time I wrote something longform that wasn’t a cover letter, or some other useless garbage that a higher-up needed to document and throw away. I haven’t the slightest clue how to keep a reader’s attention, write a book, or even a half-decent article. Nevertheless, I feel passionate enough about this topic, so here I go.

I love art. I love drawing. I enjoy the feeling I get when people show any emotional response to my creations. I enjoy it when they laugh at my funny art. I enjoy when my art makes people smile or frown. I feel a strong sense of belonging when my art causes someone to think deeply about themselves. Nothing else comes close to making me feel this very specific feeling.

This ability didn’t manifest itself out of thin air. I had to learn how to channel my thoughts and emotions into my chosen form of expression (digital illustration). It took me a decade to learn and yet I’m still an amateur. There are many techniques and skills for me to master. So much so, that I will never even get close to getting good at them all before I become dirt. And in the unbelievably rare universe in which I do master them all, I’d probably try to invent a new style to master soon after. All of this, in order to make me feel an indescribable, unique feeling when others react to my work. This shit makes me enjoy being alive.

This feeling is not exclusive to those who create digital art. Art comes in many flavors. Art could be making music, editing videos, creating games, taking photos, writing books, playing sports, acting, fishing, knitting, refurbishing old furniture, whatever. Each of these activities have endless techniques and skills one can master. Becoming an expert in any of these will open the eyes of the person who spends the time to master them. They will gain a greater understanding of the world and themselves. And if they share any of their knowledge with others, or demonstrate what they’ve learned to anyone, they will feel the feeling I’m describing.

Plenty of people have hobbies they are on-and-off with, like golfing once a month, or browsing the internet, or eating at their favorite restaurant. I have had plenty of short-lived hobbies and time-wasting addictions, and they were usually quite pleasant while they lasted! But it’s not comparable to the feeling I mentioned earlier. Each of those examples above offer temporary jolts of joy and perhaps a middling sense of belonging compared to what I feel when my work gets recognized and appreciated.

I always want to find art that I resonate with. I love diving into artist’s portfolios and learning more about them. I love seeing an athlete doing their best against another amazing competitor. I love seeing a master debater change my opinion on a topic I thought I knew a lot about. I’d love to watch a video of an amateur angler documenting their journey learning about river fishing. I’d love to see how a professional would go about refurbishing an incredibly fragile chair while trying to preserve its original look and feel.

So then, in what universe would one think that I’d want to see an AI generated, soulless, fucking husk of art that belongs to no one. Why would I want to see something that’s been created with vague intentions and unknown sources. What is the point of me seeing this “piece of art?” I cannot derive meaning from it, since the machine just made something it guesses I’d picture when I consider certain parameters. I cannot learn from it, since every pixel is a series of educated guesses rather than intentional choices. I cannot relate to it since it’s been derived from an amalgamation of feelings and thoughts that the machine itself cannot comprehend accurately. I can't feel joy since it wasn’t created with any passion whatsoever. In the best possible scenario, I can laugh at it. Not with it. At it. In fact, I instinctively want to avoid it. 

Most importantly… Why would I want to deprive a deserving individual of that indescribable feeling when I recognize and appreciate their art?

Plenty of good can come from AI. But so far, all I’ve been getting shoved in my face is plenty of shit.

So then… Why aren’t we all repulsed by it? Why are there so many people who seem to find this acceptable? I can get why crypto-bros and billionaires are into it, but what about the average joe? Are there people who have never felt the feeling that I described before? I’m genuinely curious. Part of me believes that a person who has felt what I have felt cannot willingly approve of the development of AI for the means of generating art for ANY use, commercial or otherwise. Shouldn’t we immediately start regulating AI development and usage in the arts? Why doesn’t absolutely everyone have this seemingly intrinsic understanding?

Is this perhaps due to the gradual removal of the arts in K-12 education? Or maybe the decline in the quality of education in general? Or is it due to modern-day social media, slowly rotting our brains and lowering our standards? Or is it the fact that many people are simply trying to survive out there due to massive wealth inequality and don’t have the time to care about something that doesn’t bother them as much as their constant struggle to put food on the table?

I don’t fuckin know man. I’m too stupid.

-BobberWCC