After ten trillion years, the Lucas Museum of Narrative Art has finally opened to the public. I remember hearing about this project ages ago. I forgot that it was being built in LA. It took eight years. A month after its grand opening, after the hype had suspiciously died down a little too quick, my friends invited me to check out this museum together.
There's no denying that, from the outside, it looks cool. Any building that's shaped like a spacecraft with grass and trees on top of every surface gets top marks from me. The parking situation was also a sight for sore eyes. It cost a decent chunk, but it was plentiful and had a quick entry and exit.
I'm afraid the positives end there. If I were to sum up the experience that this museum provides in two words, I’d say it is overwhelmingly performative. The moment I suggested this to my friends, they laughed and agreed, saying my observation was particularly astute.
The museum has seven areas. The main gallery, the theater, the library, the giftshop, the cafeteria, the “History of Narrative Art” gallery, and the gardens. It actually has a couple more but they aren't important enough to mention.
The “History of Narrative Art” gallery was a long hallway consisting of photographs of old paintings and recreations of ancient statues. They had the Mayan calendar, renaissance paintings, and other things that were somewhat interesting. They had photos of the Sistine Chapel with the security cameras in frame which was mildly amusing. Every piece was accompanied by a small note that listed the name, place of origin, and time period. Nothing else. There was no staff nearby to offer additional details about the pieces or their creators.
The main gallery was split into many themed areas, such as comics, fantasy, star wars, sci-fi, manga, children’s media, classic paintings, etc. Each area included a mix of recreations and real copies of original works. Once again, there was no interesting information underneath any of the pieces. Not a single soul was there to offer any insight into what you were looking at. The gallery was just a never-ending array of art that people had created over the past two centuries, presented to you in an underwhelming, uninformative fashion. Is this museum designed for aliens trying to learn more about humans? I don’t get it. Even the Star Wars area wasn’t that cool. Just a handful of statues and costumes from the films. The collection was weak. I’m not a big fan of Star Wars, but I know my friends are, and even they were slightly amused at best.
The gift shop was mind-boggling. You’d think it would be full to the brim with exclusive merchandise from George Lucas’s catalog of movies, or perhaps unique items referencing storytelling as a whole, but no. It only had a few Star Wars related items. Most of the space was reserved for prints of well-known books which can be found literally anywhere else on Earth or famous artwork printed on ill-fitting objects. There was a skateboard that had Frida Kahlo on it. What the hell are we doing here man.
As if I wasn’t underwhelmed enough, the library was our final visit. Holy shit. We were trying our best not to laugh after we entered. It was a space no larger than an average sized classroom. Only one of the walls had shelves on it. The upper two “floors” of shelves were closed off. And the books on the shelves were just the exact same books in the gift shop. Guys. All of these books can be found at your local library without a single doubt. What the fuck is this. They call this library the “Public Research Library.” Brother, what in God’s name is being researched here? How to read? Cuz anyone that’s in this room who is actually grabbing a book off the shelf is only doing so to take pics for their social media, adding to this grand performance of a museum.
I had already been walking around for 4 hours and I was starting to fall asleep. Once again, the only part I found cool was the actual architecture of the building. It was cool from the inside, and from the outside. Everything else was laughably mundane and performative. It turns out, simply showcasing a massive collection of humanity’s finest works is not enough to create an interesting experience. I could’ve got the same thing at home by googling the images myself. Hell, at least the Wikipedia articles would tell me something interesting about what I was looking at.
I appreciate authenticity above all. Many of you know this. If you are the same, then this museum will leave you confused and irritated. It’s as if you’re walking into a real-life manifestation of someone’s letterboxed account. No one gives a fuck about your review of Citizen Kane, Lucas. Instead, show us the crack you were smoking when you made the holiday specials.
- Bobwars